I'll Cling to the Warmth of Your Tiny Hand

Dear Peeparoni, 

I do believe as of late my brain has been extracted straight from my skull, maybe it is in the Kirby sweeper Grandma P and Bahboo let us borrow while waiting for ours to get repaired.  They say Kirby has super suction?  It is a possible explanation right? Friday night Dadoo texted us to meet him at 5:45 to eat at the Bakehouse.  Mama jumped to it to get you dressed and quaffed and rushed out the door, I thought we were going to be late.  We sat down at a cozy table by the front window where you "fed" and hugged Nori and waited.  and waited. and waited so finally I texted...

-To Dadoo, "Ok, we r here Taco."  

-Dadoo responded, "I said 5:45...I'll be there when I get off of work. Love u."  

(Huh?  It is past 5:45 now!  So I looked at my phone, gulp, and texted back at 5:06,)

-To Dadoo, "Er I am a dummy. thought that is what time it is. See ya in 40."  

So with 40 minutes to burn I decided we'd go for a walk around the square.  The fall chill was trying to slip into our unseasonably warm October, perhaps realizing her poor timing as well because it was crisp enough I didn't want to stay outside for very long.  I reached down to grab your hand to cross the street... 

Lately I've been getting these little flash of moments, snap shots if you will, of things I never want to forget about you right now.  Sometimes I think it is flashbacks to the made up kid we carried with us for so long while waiting for you, the dreams of things to come that always seemed just out of reach.  A deja vu feeling.  Last week it happened while doing your laundry.   I reached down into your basket to grab some clothes to throw into the washer and KaPOw!  A lone dirty sock all pilled and tinged from the play you do resting flat on the top.  It made me freeze.  "WE HAVE A BOY! OH MY GOD! WE HAVE A BOY!...THAT BOY IS GOING TO BE A TEENAGER SOMEDAY! Wow!"  Simple but moving all at the same time, the little beats of gratitude.  Oh what a dirty little sock can do.  People still waiting to be parents know this, I can remember not being able to go through the children sections in stores anymore.  I would get dizzy and panic stricken wondering when we'd find our Henny.  I digress.  

Back to the square...We left the Bakehouse and stood on the corner waiting for the light and KaPOw!  I feel a squeeze at the end of my arm and look down to appreciate the little puffed pastry of a hand locked into mine.  Your fingers have grown much longer but the thumb pasty from sucking wrapped around mine while the other four digits did little tap dances against my index finger.  Sigh, wonderful!  We stopped into the photo gallery on the corner and discussed the scenes in great detail.  Your words and memory are amazing for such a little dude.  You liked a close up tin type rendition of the moon, naming it with great enthusiasm.

Moments later we found ourselves at the music store.  You started naming instruments; drums! piano! geetar!  Then I remembered we had lost your harmonica in Chicago so we bought a new one.  This one with a sleek outside and deep blue innards.  It came with a little case and a shammy to wipe off the spit and to keep it shiny.  The case became one of the first things you've ever tried to put in a pocket.  

As you tried to get it in you were walking in a circle like a dog chasing its tail.   We took a long walk back to the Bakehouse down an alley.  I tried to get some tuff pictures of you playin' your harmonica.  We spot Dadoo and order dinner.  

You enjoyed yours, spinning pretzels on your finger.  I'm grateful for unexpected moments with my Peep like our 40 minutes, as long as you're holding my hand, nothin' else matters.

Love, Mama