7 it is!

Dear Henny Bear, It is here!  Your birthday! Wednesday you turned 7. Whaaat!?  You love nothing more than celebrating your birthday and Christmas, only days have to pass before you ask how long before another one.  It isn't just the presents you love so much.  It is the focus on family and visits and cake and... okay, presents.  This year after your short day at school I took you to visit with J and your birth bros.  It was a rainy day and your nervousness had me swing by home to get a couple of toys you wanted to take to share. On the way home you said, "HEY! How did JoJo know to call YOU if she didn't know you already? That's a part of the story you've never told me! I just thought of that."  

I said, "Well, I have told you a million times but I'll tell you again.  I took a profile letter to my OBGYN doctor, that's the doctor that deals with pregnant woman and women body parts.  Two weeks later she got our profile letter and it had things about us and a free number she could call."  

"Did she call you then?"

"Nope, she shared our letter with friends and family and held on to it from September until Dec. 25th.  Then she called us around 5:30pm on December 25th and then we met Jan 3rd and started making a plan together for the baby."  

"Oh! 'cause I thought, "How did she know how to call you?"
It is funny how early and often I have told you the story of your early days but it was exciting for me that you finally had a question.  I let you know you could ask me or Daddy anything or even ask JoJo anything you wanted.  

Loaded up with your toys, we got to JoJo's new, cozy comfortable country cabin.  JoJo gave us a tour and when you made it to her room she showed you that her sock money was sitting at the corner post of her bed.  You thought that was pretty cool and she took it down to show you your little hospital wrist band and the pitiful white gown we had to borrow from the hospital because you pooped all over the take home outfit.  You thought it was funny to see how tiny the wrist band was.  She told you she loved holding you and your breath smelled like nothing, it smelled like life.  How beautiful is that?  I loved that you were able to share this with her.  

You played with T and Hazel played with Jo.  They got you a funny booger ball flinger and playdoh poop maker, perfect for a 7 year old.  We sang happy birthday and you all split a giant cupcake.  

It was a great visit but time to get home to Daddy for your requested pancake and bacon dinner.  Grandma Jean had been by earlier and left some chocolate pudding, your choice over a chocolate cake. 

You were SOOOO excited to open presents.  You got a Koosh ball, some magnetic thinking putty with a big magnet, a lego kit, and a powerful magnet set that has yet to make it to the house!  You were super excited and already coming up with ways to test it with Daddy.  

You love things you can manipulate with your hands like gadgets, hinges, putty, rubics cubes and transformers.
Last night Grandpa Tim and Trish stopped by with a super cool Tech Lego kit and cheeseburgers.  Hazel also got a little bed and little clothes for her Dora doll, a bonus for her and she hogged Trish in her room the entire time she was here.  You started the Lego kit with Grandpa Tim after getting your reading done for the night.  He was impressed with how you dug right in and got started with no reservations.  

So you're 7.  I can't really believe it.  Daddy and I have been talking about how 7 is next level kid, whole new world kid, the remembering kid, the start of your internal self.  This makes us lament and cling to every second of the kid protected from the real nastiness of the world.  (Adding 6 years old Henry to my pile of Henrys)  It is all so hard to believe we've been honored to love and care for you for 7 years now.  The doctor's office said you're 4'1" and 56.8 lbs. I don't know where all of that flesh and bone came from, all of that intelligence and humor, all of that deep down sweetness and vulnerability, all of that curiosity, and personality, but I sure do adore you, love you.  I am grateful for you, love laughing with you, and creating and exploring with you.  You've learned to blow bubbles and read and write and think.  

I'd be nowhere without you.  So, I am honored to spend another birthday with you.  

Round 4 on Sunday with much of the family together to celebrate you.  What a fortunate 7 year old you are to have so much love.
Love, Mama

Adding J's words on our relationship and you at 7. 
It's hard to believe it's been a whole 7 years since I gave birth to this beautiful, wonderful, smart, funny, curious, loving awesome Super Stud little boy! 👶🏽 I can remember the exact way he smelled and felt in my arms the day he was born!! 😍 As I placed him into the loving arms of the woman I chose to be his Mother, ( I couldn't have made a better choice than her) I knew that I had made the most selfless decision a mother ever could! I chose life for my child, a better life than I could've eve dreamed he'd have!! 🙏🏽 Playing and talking with him today has truly made my heart and soul so full of joy! For him to know where he comes from and his heritage has always been very important to me, him, and his Mom! When he asks me questions about when I was pregnant, delivering him, or his birth family members, with such curiosity, innocence and love, I know that he is proud of my decision for him, and loves me as much as I do him! I love my open adoption and am truly happy I still get to be a major part of his life and share the Holidays and every other day with not only him but his family, My family!!

-You and Steve are the the most incredible parents I know, and deserve a kick ass baby momma, such as myself!!! && Wendy of course!! You all make such a beautiful family, and I couldn't imagine my life without you guys, nor would I ever want to! I know all of your families gratitude, and there is no family more deserving!! I love you so much and I thank you for loving me even through all my craziness!!! 

Pride!

Dear Kids, 
If there is any lesson we want you to learn at an early age it is self confidence in who you are and that you have a place in this world.  Not everyone you come across will support this notion, some will even directly try to tear you down and pull that awareness from you.  It is our goal to start young with the two of you establishing that everyone has a fit in this world.  This is why we support the rights of others to be happy and share love with their soul mate, no matter what package he or she may come in.  These first years of your lives our nation has been debating the rights of same sex soul mates to marry.   Daddy and I can't really wrap our heads around why it is a debate.  We have people we love who have found their soul mate in a same gender partner and we can't imagine them with anyone else.  At the very least the supreme court recently decided to support unions of same sex partners in part to protect children and give their families equal benefits under the federal law.  There are many mom, mama/ papa, daddy homes out there and if their parents' rights aren't protected than neither are their children's.  Now it is up to the state debates for what they each will allow.  Unfortunately, here in Indiana it is a depressing outlook thus far, with Mike Pence saying, "it is my belief that the traditional definition of marriage as being between one man and one woman should stand."  There has also been the grave sadness at the idea a couple of the same sex could be fined up to $10,000 and taken to jail (up to 2.5 years) for filing a marriage license on grounds the license only allows a blank for a male name and female name, thus filing the license with two male or two female names could be illegal fraud, a class D felony.  It goes further to prosecute a clerk or clergy member that would except the "fraudulent" license.  Really you ask?  Really!  I hope that by the time you read this our federal attitude toward this issue trickles down to our individual states and your response will be, "REALLY Mommy?! People did that?"  
All of this gave us cause when the IAC asked us to participate in the annual Indy Pride Parade we did!   Not only was it fun but we were treated awesome and had a great time. Possibly demystifying how hard many same gender couples feel it is for them to become parents, we spoke with many couples about your adoptions.  We walked in the parade behind the IAC banner supporting all families so that ours in turn could be honored.  

Henry, you thought we were at circus, due to the super duper pink group behind us.  You enjoyed collecting the necklaces and all the candy people threw at us.  Hazel sat in the carrier on my chest smiling and waving at all the people yelling at her, "OH MY GOSH! BABY WITH GLASSES!"  Hazelita, you really have a future in parades. 

We ate lots of bad food and Henry got to jump on the trampoline contraption for the first time.  So cool!  

On returning from getting a snow cone I found Hazel surrounded by some adoring admirers from Ohio.  

We were honored to be there and are excited to attend again next year.  We want you both to be tolerant and loving toward other people.  We hope this is a good start.
Love, Mama

Sleepy Time Sequence in Syncopation

Dear Peep and Peach, 
On the morning before our trip to Michigan City and Chicago I came into Hazel's room to wake you.  I found Henry with his hand on top of your head (Hazel).  I thought this was incredibly cute so I ran to grab my camera before I woke you. I took one shot and I gave you a little shake, saying, "Wakey, wakey, it is time for our trip!"  Unexpectedly, the two of you did a 10 to 15 second coordinated dance of sorts.  You pulled the exact same moves and I quickly snapped the few shots and then you both slipped back into your gentle snores.  It was a special way to start our trip.  Most times Peep you try to act like you just can't sit next to your little sister.  This was so sweet.  Glad I had my camera on hand.

   Love, Mama

20 Ways I Love You

Dear Henny, 
Yesterday you got into the hall closet dragging out all of the hats and scarves.  At first I was a little ticked because I had spent the last two hours struggling to get the house clean and now there was a tremendous wreck in the hall that would keep Daddy from being able to get through in his chair and I was going to have to clean it up, and that dang closet is already a wreck enough.  Instead of getting on you I allowed you to play while I folded some laundry.  I came back through the hall to find you making yourself a crazy dragon monster.  You looked transformed.  I loved it!  You had three hats and about 20 plus scarves on your small frame. (You just woke up and brought me a can of whipped cream to squirt in your mouth!  You're something else!)  Daddy and I couldn't get enough of it.  You asked me to help you finish the job so I wrapped around more scarves and helped you put on some gloves.  We went outside to take some monster pictures and when we came in you threw everything into a big pile.  I got an idea.  I wanted to wrap you back up again.  Lately you've been asking us, "Guess how much I love you?" and then you flap your arms around to make them as large as possible.  I adore this little exercize so I thought I'd do it back.  I stood you in front of me and looked you in the eyes.  

I told you I was going to wrap you up in how much I love you.  I gently told you one way I love you for each scarf.  You didn't break your eyes from mine.  After the first three scarves you leaned forward for a kiss after each subsequent wrap.  When I ran out of scarves you fell into my lap for a cuddle.  I'll save the reasons I love you just between us, though I am certain it is no secret.  It was a precious exchange after a rough day for you at the dentist.  I love you my sweet dude.  I don't want to ever hesitate to tell you why or how much.
Love, Mama

Introducing Baby Sister!

Last Thompson 3 photo just 3 minutes before seeing baby sister

Dear Son, 
This is a transitional post for our family, your life story from Mama's perspective encapsulated in this blog.  It is now that I announce the birth of dear daughter, sister Hazel Lucille Thompson, 6lbs 11oz, 19" long born September 8, 2012 in Indiana.  Her beautiful, thoughtful birthmom, WW, made the first parenting choice to place Hazel in our family after getting to know each other for two and a half months.  We were there at the hospital just minutes after she rushed her way into the world.  This post isn't about her just yet though.  In a sense it is a last post to you exclusively, as I work out how to make room and tradition on the blog and in our daily routines to include Hazel.

Thank you for the last 3 and a half years.  We are good buds.  Playing, creating, and reading our days away and learning together good behaviors from bad.  A piece of me is mourning the end of our days together, but I am excited for you to be a big brother and for sleepy, milky mouthed Hazel to wake up and join us in the fun.  Just know we didn't bring Hazel to our family to disrupt your world...but to enhance it.

So!  The days leading up to Hazel's birth you were very excited and showed it by choosing things for her and helping me set things up to take care of her when she arrived.  After getting up quickly upon the 8:02 am text, "Babys gona come," in the car as we made it to Greenwood you declared, "This is a great place to take baby sister!"  Daddy asked where you'd take her and you said, "The mall!"  Oh the difference of 10 minutes and reality!  10 minutes later we were in the hospital.  The nurse phoned the room and informed us the baby had been born and the afterbirth was being delivered.  Aye!  Mama sprinted down the hall.  I turned behind me to quickly see and hear Daddy yelling at you to come back as you jumped from his chair and dashed after me.  
A few minutes later you and daddy were entering the cleaned up delivery room.  You looked around and saw baby across the room in the incubator, nurses messing with her.  

Henry's body language is not hard to interpret

Your face was strained and you became a shy quite boy we don't often see.  You didn't want to touch her just yet and were relieved when Bahboo and Grandma P arrived.  They took you to uncle Gary's after a time.  When you returned a couple of days later you were missing Mommy and Daddy and at least touched sisters head.  Bahboo had to pull you in the room resting on top of a suitcase on wheels, which you didn't leave.  

The hospital has some hotel rooms up top so I spent some time with you jumping on the bed and begging for Henry kisses.  This perked you up and lifted your spirits.  You were ready to return to WW's room.  You were very proud of giving Hazel and her birth mom WW their special bunnies.  You had picked them out and made them, placing three hearts at the center and test squeezing the softness of their hugs.  

First Thompson 4 photo

On returning home we were a little worried that you were feeling sad about the changes to come.  Mama bought you a package of "booger" gummies.  What else could help a confused 3.5 year old than gummy booger?  

You needed Mama and Daddy so badly but "not with that baby in your hands."  The first night you were home in particular you did all sorts of wonderful helpful things like helping lay out blankets, get diapers and wipes, and to put the scoops of formula in the bottles.  You didn't want to get too close to "that baby."  I told you to give her some lovin'.  You said no! but I put her in her lamby seat and said, "Ok! That's fine, you will when you're ready."  I walked out of the room leaving you two together.  I looked out of the corner of my eye to catch you looking to see if I could see you.  I could but you didn't know and you placed your hands gently on the side of her seat and leaned over her with the sweetest of intent and the finest manners of gentle movements, puckered your your lips and softly kissed her forehead, looked at her a moment, then looked back up to see if we caught you.  You didn't know I did... I went to the kitchen with Daddy, Krispie and Currie and lost my breath.  It was so sweet and gentle I was overwhelmed.  Later I asked you to give her a kiss and you told me you did but that you would only do that in private.  

This lasted 20 seconds, maybe

I knew then you had complicated feelings swirling in your busy brain.  I think you and baby Hazel will be just fine, sure to be good buddies soon enough.  I am excited to see how you grow with this new change.  Never worry peep, you are still a mountain of importance to us...we haven't forgotten about you for a second and never will.  Thus add single child Henry to the pile of Henry's while you make this transition to brotherhood.
Love, Mama

The Power of Love

I call this Henry's Jimmy Darmody face.

Dear Peepso, 
You've had your first wedding.  April, Joe and Willie became legal family a couple of weekends ago and we got to be a part of it.   We started the trip off with your favorite Back to the Future song, Huey Lewis, The Power of Love played no less than three times in a row.  We arrived just in time after an obscenely long drive to Dayton sans air conditioner in the van, we did get you a practically new big wheel at a garage sale though. They were married at a beautiful public garden.  It was a beautiful location and thank goodness we had our mister fan on hand because lawdy it was H-O-T and sunny.  We were happy for them and touched by Joe's beautiful personalized 
vows. Of course they looked sensational too! But I am partial and you and Daddy were the two most handsome dudes there!  

You loved the big bird nest thing at the center and played like you were Kung Fu Panda.  Then it was time for Willie Dog!  

We arrived at the reception area and you and Willie Dog spontaneously hugged like dudes who go WAAAAAAAAAAAY back and took off like you saw each other yesterday to run with the big boys rather than about a year ago.  You also made friends quickly with the bowl of chocolates and any woman you could get to get one out for you.  You danced with mama and bugged the DJ for two hours all on your own to, "Please play the Power of Love by Huey Lewis, Marty likes that song."  You became quickly mesmerized with the friend named Coach, you wanted him to come back to the hotel with us.  A couple of hours later the DJ was taking a break on the other side of the room and you asked him again and after his break he obliged.  Too late Mr. DJ Man.  You were toast.  Laying on the top of the long couch you a had  a fleeting moment of recognition and then happiness that gave way to a shoulder shrug and tired eyes.  

I dragged you on the dance floor anyway.  I'd been waiting for your first wedding dance floor since a few years prior when Joe's brother Tim was married to beautiful Amie and Daddy and I watched a guy dancing with his newborn daughter in a corner by himself.  He was so in love and it was so sweet we dreamed of doing this with our kids someday.  

Willie Dog had run our little Peep so tired he couldn't take it any longer even to eat cake.  So, we left.  We went back to the hotel and had a late night swim and some BBQ chicken from up the street.  The next day we took a morning swim and met friends Amy, Mike and yes, Coach at a beautiful park.  A man and his little girl fishing along the pond gave you a worm to carry around. 

You loved this!  We said goodbye after a nice visit and returned back to Bloomington at a reasonable hour with no incident.  More weddings to come, I hope!

Love, Mama