Stay Gold Pony Boy

Dear Henry,

One of Mommy's favorite movies has always been The Outsiders.  The movie is based on the book The Outsiders, by S.E. Hinton.  Hinton was 15 when she wrote the book and 16 when it was published.  The book's plot centers around conflict and ultimately forgiveness between two social groups within the same community.   Mommy's favorite themes in the book are of growing up and the loss of innocence that naturally happens as a person compiles piles of experiences that shape their life and give them perspective.  Sometimes our experiences can be very arduous but end in valuable lessons and unforeseen blessings of insight and gratitude.  It is certain that many mommies and daddies have had long journeys before realizing parenthood.  Your Mommy and Daddy, in fact, started out in one direction and wound around until your birth mother J found and chose us for you, long before we even knew we were in her heart and you in her tummy.  Even though some of the years were painful and testing waiting for you because it ended in you, Mommy has perspective and gratitude for the pain.  I love the Robert Frost poem used in the film.   Mommy knows it by heart and often rolls it around her head at appropriate occasions.  
                      "Nothing Gold Can Stay"
                      Natures first green is gold,
                      Her hardest hue to hold.
                      Her early leaf's a flower;
                      But only so an hour.
                      Then leaf subsides to leaf.
                      So Eden sank to grief,

                      So dawn goes down to day
                      Nothing gold can stay.


Wednesday was a great day.  We played, rolled around, laughed, cuddled and ate.  It was so pretty and warm that we took a walk so I could take some fall photos of you under the beautiful yellow tree around the corner.  I put you in your newest garage sale treasure, your robot sweater.  As I took photos you enjoyed the crunchy leaves and looking up at the branches.  The lighting was a bit surreal... then there was this one sweet moment where the breeze started blowing and your breath was taken away and you sighed. 

It was a deep happy sigh and you starting picking up leaves to eat.  You loved the crunch, crunch, crinkle in your hands so much and wanted to eat them so badly that I almost couldn't take any more photos because I had to continuously stop and fish them from your mouth.  

 

They were so great you finally broke down with screaming and tears because I wouldn't let you eat them like the very hungry caterpillar.  I'm certain I saved you a very bad tummy ache.
You smiled at the wind and looked around with such wonderment in your eyes, you are golden.  I've had moments with you like this before but the environment lent an extra melancholy feel to the scene.  Peep, you will have lots of experiences in your life, hell you have already, that can take you down and out or create a scaffolding for you to raise yourself up.  Mommy can be a bit of idealist. In my idealist optimism I believe that even if these golden moments only stay in our hearts we can recapture over and over those feeling of being green and new in the world.  It is Mommy's wish for you that you always keep an air of green optimism and keep that gold despite the ways life can sometimes try to melt it away.  It won't be easy but I hope that a cool fall breeze that swirls leaves around your ears always takes your breath away. Mommy also hopes that someday when you're a teen and not acting so cool I'll have a golden green Henry folder in my head to draw from to remember that you are still learning in this world, so ease up.  

 

Here are some of the other photos, click here...  http://www.flickr.com/photos/leetha_t/

Love, Mama